Bless this mess.
The first trailer for Bravo’s long-awaited Season 13 of “The Real Housewives of New York” dropped Tuesday — and it does not disappoint.
Returning to screens on Tuesday, May 4, Ramona Singer, Luann de Lesseps, Sonja Morgan and Leah McSweeney are joined by newcomer Eboni K. Williams, the NY franchise’s first black cast member.
In true “RHONY” fashion, the clip featured lots and lots of nudity. All the ladies — even prudish Singer, 64, who whines incessantly about “class” — parade around topless, in only nipple pasties. They also paint a nude model who has a “d–k bigger than his balls.”
However, Williams, 37, is a game-changer. Not only does she give new meaning to Uptown Girl (she gets the Upper East Siders to go up to Harlem), she’s calling them out: In one scene, she confronts Singer for confusing the names of her staff members, whom Singer refers to as “the help.”
Though this season was filmed during the pandemic, you wouldn’t know it from the trailer: There are no masks in sight, even though cast and members tested positive for COVID-19, halting production several times.
Things get intense for Morgan, 57. As she yells and gets physical with production, Singer laments her excessive drinking. Though de Lesseps, 55, relapsed last season, she had a sober coach while filming this time around, according to Page Six.
But some things never change: Morgan is still fighting with de Lesseps over a guy — most likely the Countess’ ex-husband, 54-year-old Tom D’Agostino — whom Morgan maintains she had first. It looks like Lu has moved on — this time to a blond man named Garth, whom she makes out with in the teaser.
Former cast member Heather Thomson, 50, who starred on the show from Season 5 to 7, is seen in several of the shots, fueling rumors that she’s returning to the franchise.
Fans of the Bravo show will see their New York ladies head to Salem, Massachusetts, the boxing ring and a tattoo studio.
Like Oprah giving out free stuff, McSweeney, 38, ends the clip by calling her friends hoes: “You’re a f–kin’ hoe, you’re a hoe, you’re a hoe, you’re a hoe. Biggest hoes ever.”